Wednesday, February 23, 2011

365 Project! Wednesday is my favorite day to do them!

You might wonder why there are only 5 pictures - well, some were taken on my camera phone and one is still on the memory card so I'm a little behind in getting everything uploaded - but here are a few fun ones!

This is Elizabeth & I after eating at Pasquale's in Bellevue - she is so sweet and so much fun!! I love catching up!!

Skyline lunch with Nick, Barb, Susan & Dick - usually Susan doesn't come but I was beyond thrilled that she could join us on such short notice - it's kind of a tradition to go to Skyline with the crew, so it was fun to catch up and see everyone in the office that day!

Celebrating Valentines Day a little late - mound of onion rings and 2 yummy drinks...Cheddars was very yummy!

Junior, Nancy and Kalysta came down and we went to IHOP for dinner - I did a 31 party for Jeneal & Stevie that day so Kalysta & Nancy rode back down to my place since Junior was helping Richard with his truck!

Taryn & I at her wedding shower - I miss her living in DC so it was fun to catch up and spend some time with high school friends!! This is a little blurry but Taryn has a better one that uses a flash (I just forgot to put mine on auto) - funny thing is my favorite picture of us from high school is a little blurry too - ha!

Monday, February 21, 2011

Just Waiting...

These are most of my drugs (the others are in the refrigerator being kept cold) - just waiting to be used...I go back March 8th to see if my cyst is gone and it's really hard to wait an entire month for something to happen. And I think the hard part is waiting and not knowing what's going to happen - laparoscopy surgery or starting IVF.  I officially hate waiting.
The funny thing about the drugs is that they have in the past come in huge Fed Ex boxes, big brown boxes or something that takes up A LOT of room - now that we've done it so many times we know exactly what we need / don't need...the only thing I still need to find is a Sharps container to put all the needles in once they're used. I saved my old ones so that I can remember how many needles I've poked in my body for this thing called IVF.

I was thinking back the other day about how I didn't think I would ever do something like this...but I think in the back of my mind I always thought I would be able to do it myself - I wouldn't need help. I think it's how I was raised - being brought up believing "You can do anything you want - anything you put your mind to - work hard and you'll get everything you want and more" - I think because every inch of this cycle is not me doing it on my own, it's hard to cope/deal with sometimes. I don't want help - I don't want to not be able to get pregnant on my own...but it's my reality and I know I need to be ok with it. It's not that I'm against IVF, it's that I struggle with not being able to do something on. my. own. I'm a typical first born - I want to believe I can do anything I want to do - sounds very silly, but it's true! Not that I don't ask for people's opinion's (esp mom, dad, Corey, Richard etc.) but in the end, most of the time I want to do it on my own. I'll go ahead and just keep that on my list of personality traits to keep at bay! :)

Back to waiting...I would never say that "patience" was in my top 10 personality doesn't help when people like to tell you to be more patient, or "just be patient - it will happen when it's meant to happen" - anything involving patience really irritates me now...I would say at this point, after YEARS of trying and 3 FAILED IVF attempts, I am more patient than ever. Granted, "more patient" doesn't necessarily mean I'm patient - but I've come a long way - I understand it's going to take time for some things to work and that sometimes my body needs more time than my mind does! (*or vice versa) - like I've told many people before - the physical stuff you forget - your body and mind work in weird ways where you start to forget how much the lovenox shots hurt, or how many times you have to stick yourself and you just kind of forget it all...but that emotional party and finding out that you have another unsuccessful round - those moments in your mind never go away...I carry them around with me, sometimes I just think of that moment (the first, second, or third) because I remember every single cycle like it was yesterday - and I don't know why. I think my body/mind just have to remind me that I've been through a lot and I have to take it easy and remember to take each cycle on it's own and just focus on the future and what's to come...that we will be parents some day - not sure how but we will be parents and that's going to be the absolute best day of our lives!

These last few weeks have been hard just waiting and not knowing what's going to happen...I try to keep myself busy and I don't know now if that's helping or not...this week I don't have much on my plate until a 31 kickoff for a new consultant on my team on Friday / Caleb's 1st birthday party on Saturday...I'm really looking forward to relaxing this week and having a fun weekend ahead. I talked with Dr. Thomas last week to tell him I'm in more "discomfort" because it's pretty constant that it feels like someone is pushing on my lower stomach...he said because it's not pain, and that so many cysts do end up going away...he'd like me to just deal with it and see him on March 8th. So that's what I'll do...just keep waiting.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

365 Project Wednesday (since I can't hit the Tuesday mark!)

Two of my favorite girlfriends (Crystal and Lindsay) - we met for lunch last Wednesday (2.9.11) at Frisch's in Clifton - it was great to spend time with them and visit! They have two very cute boys that are fun to talk to as well!

2.10.11 - Went to Grandma & Grandpa's house and went to the Reservation in Milan to eat - not as good as the Grubb Company in Osgood we all decided but it was neat to show Richard the old house that they used to live in and yack with them (I even took a video of them telling stories!)

2.11.11 - Richard worked today so I was home by myself. Stephanie & Ryann both sent cards recently about hope & keeping my head up - I am so lucky to have such wonderful and supportive friends in my life - I don't know what I do without all of them keeping me so upbeat and positive!!

2.12.11 - 2.13.11 - Columbus trip!! Eating at Schmidt's here:
 And Bob Evans for breakfast here: :)

 2.14.11 - Happy Valentines Day Richard! I delivered cake to the firehouse!

Richard & I went up to watch Caleb for the evening and had a ball with him - he loves Sally and Sally tolerates him :)

Friday, February 11, 2011

365 Project (so far...)

Back in 2009, I did my own 365 project because I had read about people doing it online and I wanted to see if I could actually take one picture every day (for an entire year) - well, I did 364 days of the year (only missed one day completely!) and it was a blast...everyone enjoyed seeing it documented in the album and especially when the year was over - I love going back through and looking at all the photos!

I took a year off in 2010 and I'm back full-force in 2011! I decided to purchase a Project Life Kit that Becky Higgins created so that I would have no excuse not to journal since it came with all the journaling cards! I purchased the red one (back in November/early December) and in mid-December she launched a turquoise and amber option (I'll save the turquoise for next year!) - I love the red because I've seen other bloggers do it so much and I do love red - I think it looks really good! Here is a picture of the album itself:

This is the first page - it's fun to start a new project like this - wonder what it will look like when it's all done!

Here are just the first few pages of the album - it's fun to journal every day (and I try not to get behind on journaling because it is hard to catch up!):

I try to print pictures every couple of weeks because it's easier to keep up with - but sometimes I just journal along with the day and wait for a coupon code from walgreens that is worth it!
I like documenting our lives like this - it's really fun to look back even on the last few weeks like "wow, those have been fun memories!" Now if I only I could get up some energy and scrapbook my NYC trip with Corey - that is the next project!!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Project Life Tuesday - Week 5 (actually on a Tuesday!)

If you were to ask me what kind of mood I'm in today I would say "sad", "defeated" and "worn out" - went to the doctor yesterday and my cyst is still there. I am going to wait 4 more weeks and go get another ultrasound - if it's still there, we'll need to do another laparoscopy (this would be my third one - first one was for my ruptured appendix, second was for my tubes being removed) - let's just say that's not my first I'm taking the "conservative approach" as Dr. Thomas calls it and trying to wait the cyst out. Thing is - I've had cysts before - all the time actually, and everytime we go to do my baseline ultrasound, it's gone...but they've never been this big before. Dr. Thomas actually said yesterday "It's almost the size of your uterus!" (which is ~3-4 inches!) - and it's IN my ovary...not on the outside, but INSIDE....come on! He said he would prefer it be on the outside, but it is what it is - he doesn't think it looks like it has something inside of it but he really can't tell why it's so big and why it won't go away. Richard asked yesterday why we don't just do surgery now, but needless to say - I'm hoping that surgery never happens. I don't want to go through the process again...I don't. Period. And it literally makes me cry just thinking about it...

On a more happy note - here are my pictures for this week -

Wednesday, Feb. 2nd - went over to the east side of Cincinnati to look at an MI model home - the "Torrey model" - it's the only place in the tri-state where there's a model (and one for sale) built - it was nice to see because it had a double staircase which we really liked - I think we realized it wasn't our "dream home" but it was good to see what we could afford to build right now & what we have to safe up for!

Sally got a new dog bed from home goods! She loves it and I'm glad we found her one just like that - she loves nuzzling her head into the side of it and cuddling up while we watch TV!

Friday night - Olive Garden with Stephanie - I love her so much & miss her like crazy. If you're wondering why the glasses it's because something was wrong with my contact and made my eyes go CRAZY! We got to catch up and just enjoy each others company - great night!

31 Open House at my place - it was so much fun & so great to see everyone! I love having things at my house & seeing so many of my friends in the same place - it's a lot of fun! if you want more info!!

Superbowl Sunday - Go Packers (honestly, I just wanted Pittsburg to lose - it could've been ANY other team playing in the Superbowl with them - we watched the entire game and it was a good game! Superbowl 45 - Christina messing up the national anthem, facebook lighting up when the Black Eyed Peas performed and the jedi VW commercial were a few of the memorable moments. In this picture you can also see that Sally got dad to give her a Frosty Paw (sucker!)

Monday - spent the day with mom but forgot to take a picture so we went To Logan's for dinner.

Tuesday - lunch with grandma, grandpa & mom - I do love the moments when I can just relax and be with family while I'm taking some time off's harder than it sounds (believe me!)


Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Project Life Tuesday (or Wednesdays by the time I get around to it!) - Week Four?

As you can tell - the button says "Tuesday" but these posts happen any day but Tuesday for some reason. Yesterday, it was because I had a long jury duty from 9-2 and then had to come home and get ready for an awesome Thirty-One party at the Bellevue Beadery! Here are some photos from the past week that will be going in my 365 project (I'm proud of myself for getting a 30 prints for $3 from Walgreens the other day and getting all the way through Jan 30th printed already!)

Tuesday, January 25th - Sally had her yearly vet appointment - she doesn't even seem to notice the cat giving her the evil eye - she just wants to see what's going on behind the counter! The vet said she should lose ~5lbs since she's gained that over the course of the year...guess the mile walk every day isn't enough! We're cutting back her food a bit to try and help - but we know she'll lose it again when the weather gets better and she actually wants to go outside!

Wednesday, January 26th - FRIENDS on the new TV plus the new stand from IKEA that it sits on - we are spending a ton more time in the basement now (since that's where the cable box - DVR is) - it's  nice, because it's starting to feel more home-like down there! :) I love when Richard doesn't mind that I watch FRIENDS - I know it's not his favorite show but it makes me feel so much better after watching it so he tolerates it sometimes and I just love days like this when we just sit and watch FRIENDS (and this night we actually went to Outback/furniture shopping) for a new ottoman/coffee table for in front of the couch.

Thursday, January 27th - Ryann sent me such a sweet card in the mail so I decided that this needed to be the picture of the day. Random notes in the mail are the best - so much better than bills!! I have such wonderful friends - they keep me going on the not so good days!

Friday, January 28th - We met the Boyle's up at BD's Mongolian Grille and had a ball! Rob & Richard went to Target World for a bit and Melanie and I got to sit and catch up for a little bit...we enjoy their company and look forward to the coming trips in 2011 we are planning~!!

Saturday, January 29th - Erin brought Charlie over to play with Sally - they seemed to wear each other out! It was such a nice day (as you can see Richard has on sandles/shot sleeved shirt!) so the dogs had a ball!

Sunday, January 30th - Friend catch-up day - we haven't taken a sweet tea picture in a long time so this is sitting in the KMart parking lot after finding Caleb this cute bib thing for his birthday party. We had a good time catching up and just spending some one on one time together! Love this girl!

Monday, January 31st - So Richard tells me that morning (through text) that he can't wait to show me what he's bought - that it's so cool. I met him at Frisch's for lunch (since he had class all day) and he shows me that it's a white castle candle (he said they money goes to charity) and it smells like white castle when you burn it. My husband decides to sit it on the kitchen counter the other day so when I came in it smelled like nastiness...this candle immediately went into the garage where I hope it one time finds it's way into the trash can!! Oh Richard...

Tuesday - February 1st - My first "official" party of 2011 at the Bellevue Beadery - what a great time with the girl's and Jen & Michelle did a wonderful job with the food / treat table - Michelle even gave me a gift for doing a party with her (she's too nice to me!) - and they used thermal totes to show all the different stuff - it was really cute! I also wanted to show a picture of the table all set-up...I have accumulated so much stuff it's unreal! I even sold some of the stuff that had retired to someone there at the party - it was good to get rid of it!

All in all, great week - still trying to relax and take it easy (easier said than done)!